Truthful Thursday - Happy outside - Sad inside

One of the blog I am following uses this line on some of her posts. " I am not gonna lie".  And her most recent post was "Something sad, something happy".  So for today's post, I will follow her lead.  These are the things "I am not gonna lie"

• that every now and then I am still asking the WHY about my son's death
• that each time I hear a song that reminds me of my son, there's still that sharp pain in my heart.
• that when I see the same model of car that my son drove, I still wonder where he would be going.
• that each time a new electronic toy is being released, I know he would be the first to get it or he will ask me to get it here in the Silicon Valley.
• that for the last 4 months when my step grandson Gamble, plays Wii and would always pick Gino's profile and would say - I love that guy - my heart jumps for joy.
• that when I start feeling sad and maybe a little depressed - I would watch one of the video of my son's trip with his best friend to Winnipeg to watch the Kanye West concert.  
• that although I am very happy with my retired life in sunny San Jose, inside there's always a sad part that keeps reminding me that life is really short.

Something happy - that my daughter is doing just fine without me living in the same city.

Something sad - that my daughter and I will have to go on with life without any answers to WHY.

This one of my favorite photo of my son and daughter.  This is my something sad and something happy.

This is one of my daughter's happy song and after hearing this it also became my happy song.