Memories Monday - It's time to say goodbye

For the last eleven years, I have been writing poems in memory of my son.  But this year it is a little different.  I tried to write something and nothing was going right.  Instead I painted a rock and I placed it below the memorial tree, an dwarf Alberta spruce that we planted when we move to Vernon. This tree has been relocated to the backyard and I could see it directly from my sewing room.  There's no explanation that I can provide why I never could write a poem.  It doesn't mean I am not hurting anymore, it doesn't mean we have forgotten and definitely not because we don't miss him anymore. I am a little sad because I decided to quit blogging as of today.  

Memories Monday - I still miss my son

Today when I turn the page of my calendar that's on my desk, the following quotes were on the page:

There is no fear in letting tears come.  Sadness is a gift to avoid the nothingness of

numbness, and all hard places need water.  Grief is a gift, and after a rain of

tears, there is always more of you than before. Rain always brings growth.

My son would have been celebrating his 38th birthday today but sadly he was gone too soon.  Sometimes I wonder how mothers who lost a child cope each time that date occurs.  Do they stop counting their age after they are gone? Would you even do something or just do nothing?  I remember the first couple of years, we would get together with most of his best friends and go to the place where they had fun.  But after that, it seemed like everyone had moved on and there was no need to get together.  It seems sad but everyone says life has to go on without him and of course I followed that because I had no choice.  But days like today always makes me sad and even after eleven years, I am still counting how old he would have been. I am still paying tribute to my son on this blog because somehow I feel better writing about it.  Maybe instead of being sad, I will reminisce all the good times we had together.  Today I will celebrate the life that we had with him.  I will always miss him, not just on his birthday, but everyday for as long as I can. 

Memorial Monday - It's so hard to say goodbye

The past couple of weeks has been a little tough and a bit sad as well.  It's not my excuse for not posting anything new, but I am sure you will understand.  After receiving a phone call form my sister that my brother (he is the oldest in our family) has been in the hospital for a few weeks.  A couple of days later, I got another call, my brother is in ICU.  It was time to make a decision whether to go or not, but it was not difficult.  I knew I had to go.  From past experience, I seem to get the similar news, but a little late and I guess you can figure out what happened.  Luckily I was able to get flights within a couple of days and I arrived at the hospital.  I guess I was not prepared to see my brother's health condition.  My sister and I stayed for most of that day.  We returned about mid morning and was given the not so great message about his condition.  The chaplain was there within minutes and the last rite was given.  My sister and her two sons plus myself were there beside him.  The whole staff of that unit made sure my brother was comfortable and made sure they were there when he called.  Shortly after twelve noon, I told me sister to grab some lunch with her son.  I stayed with my brother and held his hand.  A short prayer was left by the chaplain for us.  There was nothing I could do but decided to read the prayer to him.  It seemed to comfort him and then it was time.  I am thankful that he did not die alone,  I was there still holding his hand.  Saying goodbye was so painful but knowing he is not in pain and now at peace, somehow makes it easier to understand this circle of life.  We will miss him but will never forget the good memories.  

Memories Monday - Celebrating Canadian Thanksgiving

As the saying goes, "it's better late than never".  We have been busy for the past week entertaining our very first guest to our CPBB.  Our friends J and G from Discovery Bay arrived a week ago and left this morning, which is Wednesday.  So it's not so bad, I am only two days late.  We took them for some beautiful scenic drive from Vernon to Penticton.  During their stay we ate our breakfast and dinners at home but had lunch out since we seem to be out around noon.  We tried several restaurants like the Turtle Bay Pub in Lake Country, the Match pub and grill at the Penticton Casino.  For their last night, they took us to dinner at the Alexander's pub in Coldstream.  The other fast food we tried are Fatburger in Kelowna, Station BBQ and Wings tap and grill in Vernon.  For our first Canadian Thanksgiving Dinner, Jeff was in charge.  He did everything except for the cranberry sauce which I made and Jean made the baked cauliflowers.  We couldn't decide what to have for dessert so we ended up with a store bought apple pie which was not too bad.  Of course I remembered to take some photos so I could share them with you all.  Hopefully everyone had a wonderful thanksgiving with their families or friends or maybe decided to do something different.  This day would not be complete without giving thanks, for having great friends and caring family and for having a good life with very little stress.

Memories Monday - Losing a loved one

From our family to yours, we send our sincerest sympathy and condolences.  It takes time to heal and grieve so be gentle with yourself.  I know, I have been there.  Our caring thoughts are with you during this time of sorrow.  For my sister in law and for my BFF's mother.

Memories Monday - Celebrating Life

For the past few months we were receiving sad news about our friend's mother or father or a relative passing away.  One of my followers was wondering why I haven't posted any for a week.  It's a bit difficult to be so joyful and full of life when your friends are going through their grieving process.  The one thing that is comforting to them is that their loved one is not in pain.  Some of them have chosen to have a Celebration of Life instead of the traditional viewing/funeral.  They say that it comes in waves of three but since October, I have received at least ten notices of losing someone.  It's a little sad when you start buying sympathy cards in bulk and finding out you needed more.  Sometimes you start running out of things to write, comforting words are taking longer to write.  For those of you who have experienced these type of loss, you know exactly what I am talking about.  Life is short- that seems to be the phrase that keeps being used.  Enjoy life is another one.  I am very lucky to have retired early to enjoy the fruits of my labor.  I am enjoying life to the fullest and every moment is cherished.  We will never forget our loved ones that has gone before us.  We will remember the memories. 

Memories Monday - Memorial Day

Happy Memorial Day to my readers who are residing in the USA.  While enjoying a day off and maybe some celebration or even taking advantage of the big sales, it would be respectful to take a few moments to remember the men and women who died serving for their country.

For me it's a day to get busy to prepare for my big day tomorrow.  I am so glad my sister is here to help me with all prepping and cooking for my little birthday party.  I say little because if I compare it to my 40th or 50th, this one is definitely little.  The most important part is that I am celebrating life and very thankful that I am reaching this special age.  I am so thankful that I am retired and enjoying life each and every day.  A few of my friends have remembered because I have received birthday cards during the past couple of weeks.   Now I have to keep this post short as my TO DO list seems to be getting longer.

Finicky Friday - It's time to clean up

Finicky, Fussy, Picky, etc.  when it comes to home, health and habits.  But I am not the same as Sheldon or Howie Mandel.  I like to keep our home tidy and clean, our closets organized and basically just an orderly household.  There's a big difference when the house is a bit messy because of children but it's not really dirty or untidy.  When I see a house or home with children and the whole place is not only dirty, messy but filthy, then it really bothers me a lot.  Sometimes I just want to ask the owner if I can come in and help them clean it but I guess if that's their way of living, it will be the same mess after a couple of hours.

Spring is in the air and as they say, it's time to spring clean.  I remember my daughter telling me about this rule.  When you buy something new, like undies, socks, etc.  then you have to get rid of one or two old ones to make room for the new ones.  Since then I have followed that rule and it works very well. Jeff and I would go through our clothes, linen, etc. and check out things we don't use and or need. Have you started your spring cleaning? Do you like organizing things around your home by category or color or do you label everything?

This is not mine but I love the color coding and shoe arrangement.

 

 

Manipedi Monday - A day just for me

Every once in a while I like spending a day doing something that is just about me.  I know it might be a little selfish but I figured, I am retired and I should not be guilty.  Now that I have at least three volunteer jobs, it's nice to have a day when I get pampered.  It could involved my regular appointment at the hair salon, maybe a mani pedi (I do my own most of the time) and once or twice a year I get to go to a real Spa and have an hour classic massage.  When I lived in Canada, I had a very special massage therapist named Carolyn.  She is so awesome as she works on different parts of your muscles and releases the tightness where it's needed.  She has her own business at home so it's very relaxing.  The last time I had the mani pedi, I chose turquoise.  Sometimes it's good to check how they do certain design as I learn from it.

Nail Salon Manicure

Nail Salon Pedicure

My own Manicure

My own Pedicure

Merry Monday - Four More Sleeps

That's right, only four more sleeps before my daughter and favorite SIL (son in law) arrives.  We are very happy that they were able to take the time off their busy schedule to spend time with us here in the good old USA.  This is their second visit since I moved here and I am hoping there will be more in the years to come.  We have been making some plans on where to go, where to shop, which restaurant to try and of course we will have our own Easter Egg Hunt.  I have to make sure that we get a lot of photos together because the last time my daughter and I had only one photo taken. This was the one and only photo and I had to copy this one from her blog which she posted yesterday.

There are still a lot of things I need to finish before she arrives so I am keeping this blog short. It will be such a nice treat to see her again and have some special moments even if it's only for nine days.